Back to School Fancy Dinner

It's funny how once you carry out a tradition a few times, your children hold you to it.

We flew home from Michigan less than 36 hours before school started, but the boys completely expected our traditional back to school fancy dinner before embarking on the new school year. They asked me over and over what our new theme was going to be and how I was going to decorate the table.

Since they were insistent on carrying out the tradition, you better believe I did what it took to throw something together. Thankfully, I already had a theme in mind, so it was just a matter of scrounging up some items around the house to make the table look "fancy."

Even though they knew what to expect at our fourth annual back to school dinner, the boys still showed just as much shock that we would throw a party just for them. No company, no birthday celebrations, no major holidays, just us. And somehow those above average place settings encouraged them to stay in their chairs, use their manners and participate in some great discussions. It's seriously like magic how they whip right into little adults for this one annual meal.

We settled on the family theme "Build Up" this year. We talked about ways that we are built up and torn down, both by others and by ourselves. We had a good discussion about how important it is to build ourselves up when it is so easy to focus on our weaknesses. And we can all do a little better at cheering each other on. 

I used the blocks to show the analogy that if your foundation is full of positivity and support, you stand firm without wobbling. But as you remove blocks one by one, over time you grow weaker and weaker until you eventually collapse. 

The great thing about this theme is that the adults in our family need the reminder just as much as the boys. Who doesn't need a little building up?

Back to School Fancy Dinner

We held our third annual back to school fancy dinner the night before school started.

We introduced our new family theme for the year, which focuses on effort.

Troy and I both shared about times we've failed and had to "try try again" to reach a goal and achieve success. Our boys have been quick to say "I can't" or "It's too hard" lately. We had a great discussion about how things don't come easy to everyone and usually the things that matter most require a lot of work and patience.

We also had a not so peaceful dinner consisting of bickering and complaining. It was nothing out of the ordinary, but I think the extra "fanciness" of napkins on laps and glasses full of sparkling cider were enough to let the tradition and discussion sink in a bit for the older boys.

I've already overheard them telling each other to "try try again" when they are struggling.

I've realized how often I still need this message myself. Here's to trying (and trying again) to teach our boys through example.

Back to School Fancy Dinner

We started the tradition of having a fancy dinner to commemorate the first day of school last year. It was such a success that I knew we had to incorporate it again.

It takes an extra amount of effort to plan and implement "extras" like this, but it is always worth it in the end. The boys kept asking if we were having company over for dinner when they saw me gathering supplies. They beamed when I revealed that all of the extra fuss was just for them. By setting the bar of excellence high, we are trying to teach them that they are valued and important to us and we have high expectations from them in return.

Last year's family theme of "Respect" was posted by our back door all year and we often referenced the concept. We settled on "Be Grateful" as this year's theme; something we can all work on.

We introduced the theme during dinner and had a great discussion about incorporating more gratitude into many aspects of our lives.

The boys picked most of the menu which included homemade macaroni and cheese, garlic rolls and fresh green beans. They were most excited about the cloth napkins and sparkling cider which justified the use of our "fancy" glasses. We topped off the meal with the chocolate chip cookies that Nash and I baked during Blake's first full day of school.

Just like last year, we plan on spending one day a month, either during a meal or for family night, focusing on our theme of being grateful and reminding our boys what we're working on as a family.

First Day of School Fancy Dinner

I've seen lots of back-to-school ideas and I knew I wanted to start a tradition in our family with the launch of the new school year.

We had a fancy first day of school dinner party to commemorate the big event.

As I sat the table in the dining room instead of our normal kitchen table, the boys asked who we were having over for dinner. When I answered that it was a special back-to-school dinner, they got all sorts of excited.

Blake exclaimed, "We're having a party just for us?!"

The boys squealed with delight when we revealed fancy glasses (theirs were plastic) and showed them how to put cloth napkins in their laps. They kept saying that it was just like a restaurant.

I thought the chalkboard napkin rings that my friend gave me were appropriate for the first day of school.

The purpose of the special dinner wasn't just about fancier-than-normal food and surroundings, but also to present our family school year theme.

We settled on "Respect". Our boys are still young, but we thought this was something they could grasp and improve on.

I was shocked at the riveting discussion we ended up having.

Not only did the boys stay in their chairs the whole time (a rarity at our house) and actually eat the dinner I made, but they actively participated in our conversation about showing respect. We talked about all sorts of scenarios where they could show more respect; school, church, friends' houses, stores, and with their parents and each other.

Blake caught on and asked Nash, "How could you respect your teacher at school?"

Nash responded, in the sweetest voice ever, "I'm not really sure, Blake. That's a good question."

What? Did that polite response really come from my child? Troy and I looked at each other, dumbfounded. We were pleasantly surprised that by creating an atmosphere that was special and different, our boys acted differently; more mature and ready to participate in the discussion we had.

Now, implementing the value of respect will be a whole different ballgame. We're obviously focusing on it because there has been a real lack of respect lately. We're hoping to dedicate one family night a month to focus on this theme and remind the boys what we're working on as a family.

The sign I made is now hanging by our back door so we all can continually be reminded. (And since the word "respect" is phonetic, Blake can actually read it.)

I think I'd call our little candlelight dinner a success.

After dinner, Blake asked, "Can we eat dinner in here every night?"