This is Heaven

The day after we brought Crew home from the hospital, Troy sent the older boys to their grandparents' house for ten days.

I should probably say that I miss them, but in reality, it has been heaven.

No messes to clean up, meals to prepare, arguments to break up, noses to wipe, or endless whining.

Sleeping in, visitors coming and going, errands to gather the last touches for our finished basement, dates with Troy (and a sleepy baby), house projects to wrap up.

Having only one baby to take care of has been a piece of cake. I can't believe I ever thought it was hard the first time around. It's amazing how our capacity for chaos grows with each additional child.

Crew can typically be found napping in my lap, or in a ball on my shoulder, or stretched out in my arms, or swaddled tightly next to me in my bed. Completely undisturbed by noise or distractions.

I am treasuring this time I have alone to soak up this sweet new life. It fills my heart with wonder that I got to bring this miracle into the world.

I love how he snuggles up to me, breathing peacefully in my ear.

I love his velvety soft wrinkly skin and the hint of softer than soft downy fuzz covering it.

I love how he flings his arms wide open when he hears a loud sound.

I love how his little mouth roots towards anything that brushes his cheek.

I love the sounds he makes while he's eating.

I love the satisfied, limp, drunken state he gets in when he's done.

I love nighttime feedings alone with him, bathed in the dim light coming from the hallway.

I love those tiny feet and hands.

I love the perfect smell he has.

I love looking into his newborn eyes and wondering what he's remembering.

And yes, I even love that sweetest ever newborn cry.

I have always adored newborns. But it's just different when it's my baby, part of me. I can almost feel my own heart beating in that tiny chest because I'm so in love.

As excited as I am for Crew's brothers to fall in love with him too, I'm so grateful for this week that I've had him to focus on all to myself.